Confidence and Fear are Opposites

Have Confidence and Overcome Your Fears

When I first started the Live Beyond Fear Project it was with the intention of showing people how fear affects their performance, productivity and personal satisfaction. Once you learn how damaging fear can be to your confidence you can begin to address it appropriately.

Fear and confidence are on the opposite ends of the spectrum of your potential for success. As one grows, the other diminishes. It is easier said than done, though. Unless, of course, you learn how to live beyond fear.

Confidence is such an illusory thing. People always looked at me and though I was so confident. I certainly appeared that way. But it was not always the case. For years I wrestled with that constant thought of not being good enough. It is a major destroyer of confidence.

It takes a lot to build esteem. Part of the problem is that we know too much about ourselves. Others may look at us and be envious. While at the same time we are looking at ourselves and seeing all of our shortcomings and flaws. Who can have confidence when we focus on all of those things that we see in ourselves as weaknesses?

That is part of the problem with building confidence and self-esteem. We spend a lot of time comparing ourselves to others. What a mistake. You see, nobody can be as good as you can at being you.

That sounds superficial or even silly at first. But it is true. You will never be anyone other than who you are. You are unique. You might think that another person is better at some skill than you, and you may be right. But there is nothing wrong with the fact that they are. You see, you have skills and traits that they don’t have.

Confidence begins when you start to get comfortable with yourself. It took me a very long time. There were so many things I wanted to be good at but could never accomplish. I always wanted to be a football player. It never worked out.  I was skinny, timid and slow, three things that impede success on the gridiron.

For the longest time this made me feel as though I was a disappointment to my father. He had been a remarkably talented football player.

I could make a list of my shortcomings, or perceived shortcomings but they don’t matter anymore. I have quit comparing myself to others. Once I did, my confidence and esteem grew wildly. And you know what? So did my successes.

Self-esteem can only come from inside. Others cannot give it to you. No matter how much praise or glory you might get, unless you believe in yourself you are always going to lack the confidence you need to be truly successful.

Building esteem is a process. It is a process you should begin right now. Sit down and make list of just five things that you can do. You do not have to be the best in the world at doing them. They can be five simple skills or talents that you have. Do not stop until you have listed five. Oh, and I am not going to believe there are not five things you can do.

Look, we know you can read. You can operate a computer or you wouldn’t be reading this. Do you know how many people in the world can’t read or operate a computer? Neither do I but there are millions of them. Do you have a job? What skills do you use in your job?

You don’t have to stop when you get to five things, in fact I urge you to go on. Because it will be a big step in building esteem and growing confidence. Building esteem and growing confidence all come easier when you learn to live beyond fear.

No one is without fear. We all have it. I have just as many fears about my daily existence as you do. But I know how to recognize when my actions and thoughts are in response to fear. That is where my confidence comes from. I immediately recognize a fears response and take appropriate action.

Companies hire me when they want their employees to be more confident and be better decision makers. As your coach, I can do that for you. Have the confidence to at least let me give you a free strategy session. I am confident that you will benefit from it. Contact me.